The game of “Honesty”. Isn’t it fun to play?
Yes, in my opinion, this is one of those things you have to have in any relationship in order to keep it from crumbling along with a few other ingredients that I won’t yet mention in today’s blog. However, it does become a game. "Take a Chance" in some situations can lead you to a place you don't want to go. Most of the time there are no "Get Out of Jail Free" cards.
We always preach to tell the truth. However, do we ever really stay true to who we are and what we think? I think the older we get, it isn’t so much of a game anymore, true honesty. The individuals who call it as it is. Call these people “Old Farts” or whatever. Problem is, people have a hard time hearing the truth. They know it already most of the time, but for some reason they have to have someone back up their own thinking. Personally, I would rather have someone be straight forward with me instead of mouthing off behind my back. How can I change and become better if someone doesn't tell me?
There are times that honesty can get you into trouble. Here are a few dreaded questions that husbands, parents, or teachers have heard:
As a husband…..(let me get this straight right now Keely…..the first question doesn’t apply to you)
“Honey, do I look fat in this dress?”
“Did you hear what I said or asked you?” I can't say yes anymore to this one when I really haven't heard.
"Were you staring at her?"
Men......."No", "Yes", "No". Some females can handle the truth. They like straight out answers. However, it's still hard to be honest all of the time. There comes a point that the word "tact" comes more into play than honesty. And so the game keeps rolling, along with many more questions that we have to quickly think of a good answer to.
As a father...........
"Dad, is Santa/The Easter Bunny/the Tooth Fairy real?" Seriously though....they are, my daughters' hearts will not be broken by me.
"Dad, don't you think this looks beautiful?" Yes.....the scribbles that you didn't take your time on look masterful. Of course, our answer will always be beautiful. Could you imagine the look on a kid's face if you said something negative?
"Dad, does this outfit look awesome?" Kids will be kids.....hey, if they want to where striped tights with a polk-a-dot shirt along with clashing colors out to the store, so be it. However, I think mom has a little more difficulty with this happening.
As a teacher..........
Many questions are the same as when your own kids ask you things. However, here are some things that happen behind the scenes.
So kids......that "Stick of Doom" that I draw to have you answer a question doesn't always have your name on it. Sometimes we just have to be strategic. Isn't it amazing how your name gets drawn when you aren't paying attention?
I've never recycled a student paper in my teaching career (ok......this is a big lie.....see, I'm being honest)
We never talk about parents or kids behind their backs. Parents who aren't teachers and have kids in school, this happens....a lot. Please, don't become some of those freaky, needy, helicopter parents that all of us teachers dread.
Honesty is important. However, tact when it comes to relationships and children is sometimes more so. Be true to yourself and keep your integrity without destroying the people around you. Like any game, you have to be strategic. :)